“All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."
- Leo Tolstoy, opening sentence - Anna Karenina.
The Harley Davidson Road King thunders into the family reunion and an eerie silence accompanies the rumble of the V-twin engine. Heads turn and stare as if Martians, in fact, have landed. Uncle Earl has entered the park.
Earl, the Crazy Uncle – all families have one. No one knows what he does, and everyone is scared to ask.
Earl, of course, is late and his pre-teen nieces, nephews, and first and second cousins one removed, all come tumbling toward the roar with whirling arms and legs - like kids toward the Good Humor ice cream truck in August.
The actual teens look up from their phones and eye the uncle with affected nonchalance - their eyes are smiling.
The pre-teens follow the Earl through the food tables and watch his paper plate bow under the combined weight of Grandma Maggie’s fried chicken, Sis Mabel’s potato salad, Miss Bernice’s green bean casserole. Enough food to ballast the Titanic.
Earl sits alone with his flock gathered and bows his head in silent prayer.
“HOW Y’ALL DOIN’?" he suddenly bellows as the kids scatter in giggles.
By mid-afternoon Earl is asleep – head plopped on a picnic table. Assorted relatives whisper about his “lifestyle.” Children ponder what a “lifestyle” is and how to get one.
Curiosity aroused, pre-teens begin a game of poke and run. The poke is to try to wake Uncle Earl and the run is in case they are successful.
Finally awakened, Earl growls, “WHO WANTS TO RIDE?” and they all come squealing back in joy.
He draws them close and whispers, “Go ask your father.” Experience has taught him “Go ask your mother” does not work and by now mothers and fathers are in separate camps spread over the park.
Children of brothers-in-law or distant relatives return – folks that missed the “lifestyle” whispering. These children get a helmet and a spin around the park. When no one is looking, the teens put their phones in their pockets and cop a ride. Earl takes them down the road a bit.
Earl knows that, like their first kiss, these kids will not forget how it feels to ride a motorcycle. 1, 5, 10, 20, even 40 years later, a few will become motorcyclists.
Bruce Springsteen may have “found the key to the universe in the engine of an old parked car.” These kids will find the key in the twist of Uncle Earl’s throttle.
All motorcyclists are alike - happy.
How about you? Describe your first ride? Share a story?
2nd Helping
Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy:
Amazon.com: Anna Karenina: 8601400171455: Tolstoy, Leo, Pevear, Richard, Volokhonsky, Larissa: Books
“Growin’ Up” – Bruce Springsteen:
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